{"id":8305,"date":"2012-04-15T06:00:18","date_gmt":"2012-04-15T10:00:18","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/?p=8305"},"modified":"2012-04-14T11:49:40","modified_gmt":"2012-04-14T15:49:40","slug":"turning-up-the-heat-what-not-to-wear","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/?p=8305","title":{"rendered":"Turning up the heat: what not to wear"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span style=\"font-size: medium;\"><em><strong><span style=\"font-family: arial,helvetica,sans-serif;\">With summer-like heat coming, don&#8217;t lose your head or fashion sense<\/span><\/strong><\/em><\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: arial,helvetica,sans-serif;\"><strong>By Kelly Hockenberry<\/strong>, <span style=\"font-size: x-small;\"><em>Columnist, UnionvilleTimes.com<\/em><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/04\/UTKellyColumn1.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignright  wp-image-8307\" style=\"margin: 4px;\" title=\"UTKellyColumn\" src=\"http:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/04\/UTKellyColumn1-250x300.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"175\" height=\"210\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/04\/UTKellyColumn1-250x300.jpg 250w, https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/04\/UTKellyColumn1-83x100.jpg 83w, https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/04\/UTKellyColumn1.jpg 400w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 175px) 100vw, 175px\" \/><\/a>The rumor is the thermometer will hit the mid-80\u2019s today and a few days this week!\u00a0 Yipppeeeee!<\/p>\n<p>I am more than ready to ditch my heavy jacket and leave my boots permanently in the closet!<\/p>\n<p>The initial tease of summer brings radiant sunshine, brilliant blue skies and glorious temperatures; BUT, there is a dark side to the celebration\u2026<\/p>\n<p>THE DREADED \u201cTOO MUCH TOO SOON\u201d FASHION EXPOSURE PROBLEM!<\/p>\n<p>Let\u2019s prevent it this year, OK?<!--more--><\/p>\n<p>Here are my tips: (I\u2019m really digging the list making thing\u2026have you noticed?)<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Capri pants are NEVER OK.\u00a0 NEVER.\u00a0 Well, let me re-phrase.\u00a0 If you are 5 years and under, capri away!\u00a0 HOWEVER, for the rest of us, it means a big, fat NO.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>The acceptable exception to the capri is the CROP pant (hits close to the ankle).\u00a0 VERY different.\u00a0 How?\u00a0 Think of your knee-cap to mid-shin as the danger zone.\u00a0 Pants should NOT stop at either point, otherwise, you look squat\u2026and, last time I checked, \u201csquat\u201d doesn\u2019t mean \u201chot.\u201d<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Short-shorts.\u00a0 Really?\u00a0 Who can take you seriously in that get-up?\u00a0 NO ONE, that\u2019s who.\u00a0 Plus, if you are anything like me, you are so pale you resemble those hideous translucent fish who live in the bottom of the ocean.\u00a0 And, no one wants to see that in April.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>Bermuda Shorts = Mom jeans.\u00a0 Don\u2019t do it.\u00a0 If you do not feel comfortable in a short with a five-inch inseam, your best bet is a skirt or sundress.\u00a0 Bermuda shorts remind me of carpenter jeans (ewww!) Plus, you\u2019re in Unionville, not on safari.\u00a0 Get over it.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>Ankle bracelets.\u00a0 Why do women feel the need to adorn their ankles when the weather gets warm?\u00a0 I\u2019m going to go out on a limb and say that there is no such thing as a \u201cclassy\u201d ankle bracelet.\u00a0 For those of you out there who beg to differ, please, send me an example.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>Too-tight white jeans.\u00a0 OUCH.\u00a0 This is so very, painfully unflattering.\u00a0 My suggestion when it comes to white jeans is to buy them a size up and always (ALWAYS) pair them with nude undergarments.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>Belly button piercing.\u00a0 See: ankle bracelets.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Upon review, I find it amusing that most men would probably beg to differ with my list.\u00a0 In fact, I\u2019m pretty sure that if you walk down State Street in too-tight white short-shorts with an ankle bracelet and exposed belly button piercing, you\u2019ll get a cat call (or two).<\/p>\n<p>Your choice.<\/p>\n<p>Happy Weekend!!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>With summer-like heat coming, don&#8217;t lose your head or fashion sense By Kelly Hockenberry, Columnist, UnionvilleTimes.com The rumor is the thermometer will hit the mid-80\u2019s today and a few days this week!\u00a0 Yipppeeeee! I am more than ready to ditch my heavy jacket and leave my boots permanently in the closet! The initial tease of [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":8307,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5,7],"tags":[255,406,1117],"class_list":["post-8305","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-community","category-featured","tag-fashion","tag-summer","tag-warm-weather"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8305","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=8305"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8305\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/8307"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=8305"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=8305"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=8305"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}