{"id":25245,"date":"2015-04-12T06:00:02","date_gmt":"2015-04-12T10:00:02","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/?p=25245"},"modified":"2015-04-17T09:37:01","modified_gmt":"2015-04-17T13:37:01","slug":"tankinis-rue-the-muffin-top","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/?p=25245","title":{"rendered":"Tankinis: rue the muffin top"},"content":{"rendered":"

While I’m more open to the concept, the\u00a0crop shirt\u00a0version is a bad idea<\/strong><\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

By Kelly Hockenberry<\/strong><\/span>, Columnist, The Times<\/em><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

\"KellyColumn415Revised\"<\/a>I may be rushing things a bit…but, when the weather turns warm (and it\u2019s supposed to be in the\u00a0upper 60\u2019s this week which sounds downright tropical) my thoughts automatically turn to the\u00a0torment of bathing suit shopping. The yearly pilgrimage to the mall (armed with lots of self\u00a0tanner and a prophylactic Advil) is not something that I look forward to.<\/p>\n

As much as I loathe the\u00a0fluorescent ambiance of the dressing room, I feel strongly that trying\u2020on\u2020swimsuits is a\u00a0necessary evil. I don\u2019t know about you, but, when I make online purchases I never end up\u00a0looking like the stunning model featured on the website. At least at the store you have quick\u00a0access to multiple size and shape options to torture yourself with.<\/p>\n

If you pick up any magazine, there are a million tips and tricks about \u201cemphasizing this\u201d and\u00a0\u201cdistracting from that\u201d but I find, when it comes to bathing suits, classics are classic for a reason.<\/p>\n

\"Bathing-suit-\"<\/a>A simple tank style one piece,\u00a0an \u201cacceptable\u201d tankini and a flattering, modest coverage bikini\u00a0should be in every fashionable woman\u2019s closet.<\/p>\n

I have written in the past about my aversion to tankinis and I caught a lot of flack from my\u00a0girlfriends. I understand that a tankini is\u2020more practical, for ease of use and what not…blah,\u00a0blah. SO, I am redacting my former \u201cNever Wear a Tankini\u201d statement and replacing it with\u00a0\u201cNever Wear an Old Lady Tankini\u201d. Simply put, find a tankini that LOOKS like a onepiece.<\/p>\n

It is\u00a0MY opinion (and, let\u2019s face it, my fashion opinions really are important) that buying the cropshirt\u00a0version is a big, fat NO.<\/p>\n

Exhibit A: (keep in mind that this is a Victoria\u2019s Secret model. If you look like her, you have\u00a0everyone\u2019s blessing to wear it. Otherwise, walk away.<\/p>\n

\"Bathing<\/a><\/p>\n

The problem with a suit like this is that it has the potential to create a muffin top scenario. Muffin\u00a0tops are only enjoyable with a side of coffee. The floral suit pictured in the collage above (from\u00a0Anthropologie) is a MUCH better choice. Notice how the top comes allllllllllll the way down to\u00a0meet the bottom. Thumbs up.<\/p>\n

What are YOUR best suggestions for making bathing suit shopping less painful? Share in the\u00a0Comment section below!<\/p>\n

Happy Weekend!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

While I’m more open to the concept, the\u00a0crop shirt\u00a0version is a bad idea By Kelly Hockenberry, Columnist, The Times I may be rushing things a bit…but, when the weather turns warm (and it\u2019s supposed to be in the\u00a0upper 60\u2019s this week which sounds downright tropical) my thoughts automatically turn to the\u00a0torment of bathing suit shopping. […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":25246,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[7],"tags":[255,3119,406],"class_list":["post-25245","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-featured","tag-fashion","tag-one-piece","tag-summer"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/25245","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=25245"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/25245\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":25247,"href":"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/25245\/revisions\/25247"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/25246"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=25245"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=25245"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=25245"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}