{"id":14684,"date":"2013-03-24T06:00:15","date_gmt":"2013-03-24T10:00:15","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/?p=14684"},"modified":"2013-03-23T11:25:26","modified_gmt":"2013-03-23T15:25:26","slug":"airing-my-fashion-grievances-2013-edition","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/?p=14684","title":{"rendered":"Airing my fashion grievances, 2013 edition"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span style=\"font-size: medium;\"><em><strong><span style=\"font-family: arial,helvetica,sans-serif;\">My new list of alarming fashion trends<\/span><\/strong><\/em><\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: arial,helvetica,sans-serif;\"><strong>By Kelly Hockenberry<\/strong>, <span style=\"font-size: x-small;\"><em>Columnist, The Times<\/em><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/03\/UTNuKellyColumn3.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignright  wp-image-14703\" style=\"margin: 4px;\" alt=\"UTNuKellyColumn\" src=\"http:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/03\/UTNuKellyColumn3-250x300.jpg\" width=\"175\" height=\"210\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/03\/UTNuKellyColumn3-250x300.jpg 250w, https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/03\/UTNuKellyColumn3-83x100.jpg 83w, https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/03\/UTNuKellyColumn3.jpg 400w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 175px) 100vw, 175px\" \/><\/a>Every so often, I like to air my fashion grievances.\u00a0 They are not always met with support from you, the reader\u2026but I can\u2019t seem to stop myself.<\/p>\n<p>We\u2019ve been over (and over) my dislike for capri pants, jean shorts on men, Birkenstocks, artificial nails and scrunchies.\u00a0 I have waxed poetic regarding \u201cjust saying no\u201d to Vera Bradley bags, Pandora bracelets and thumb rings.<\/p>\n<p>Well, I have a few more to add to my ever-expanding list\u2026.<!--more--><\/p>\n<p><b>Lucite clutches<\/b> as shown here (carried by Astrid Munoz during Fashion Week). \u00a0I just DO NOT GET THIS.\u00a0 First of all, I\u2019m pretty sure this clear box costs several hundred dollars and secondly, it\u2019s just downright idiotic.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/03\/Kelly12.png\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-medium wp-image-14686\" alt=\"Kelly1\" src=\"http:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/03\/Kelly12-300x256.png\" width=\"300\" height=\"256\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><b>White heels <\/b>(like this piece of work from Chinese Laundry).\u00a0 They seem to be all the rage for spring and I can\u2019t get over their sterile, nursing uniform appearance.\u00a0 I will NOT be rocking these, mark my words.<\/p>\n<p><b><a href=\"http:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/03\/Kelly22.png\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-medium wp-image-14687\" alt=\"Kelly2\" src=\"http:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/03\/Kelly22-300x300.png\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" \/><\/a><\/b><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>The <b>\u201cfull\u201d eyebrow<\/b> shown here from a picture at <a href=\"http:\/\/www.jennajulieta.blogspot.com\" target=\"_blank\">www.jennajulieta.blogspot.com<\/a>.\u00a0 To me, this lovely gal needs a wax, STAT.\u00a0 Just my opinion.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/03\/Kelly32.png\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-medium wp-image-14691\" alt=\"Kelly3\" src=\"http:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/03\/Kelly32-199x300.png\" width=\"199\" height=\"300\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/03\/Kelly32-199x300.png 199w, https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/03\/Kelly32-66x100.png 66w, https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/03\/Kelly32.png 337w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 199px) 100vw, 199px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>The <b>uneven hemline <\/b>(available from Bailey 44\u2026.but, don\u2019t you dare buy one!)\u00a0 This asymmetrical look was wrong in the 1990\u2019s and remains so today.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/03\/Kelly41.png\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-medium wp-image-14696\" alt=\"Kelly4\" src=\"http:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/03\/Kelly41-257x300.png\" width=\"257\" height=\"300\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Apparently, this is Gwyneth Paltrow\u2019s \u201cnighttime occasion\u201d outfit as featured on her website, Goop.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/03\/Kelly51.png\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-medium wp-image-14698\" alt=\"Kelly5\" src=\"http:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/03\/Kelly51-215x300.png\" width=\"215\" height=\"300\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/03\/Kelly51-215x300.png 215w, https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/03\/Kelly51-71x100.png 71w, https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/03\/Kelly51.png 618w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 215px) 100vw, 215px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>WHERE IS SHE GOING?\u00a0 Because, although we can all agree that her stomach is remarkable, I think she may be forgetting that she is forty.\u00a0 Even those fantastic Jimmy Choo stilettos can\u2019t save this get-up.\u00a0 Belly shirts (no matter how thin you are) = horrifying.\u00a0 A much better version would have included a shirt that covered her naval and a well-cut blazer. Just goes to show that even Hollywood royalty can have a \u201cWhat Not to Wear\u201d moment.<\/p>\n<p>Well, there you have it.\u00a0 My most updated list of couture criticisms.<\/p>\n<p>Happy Sunday!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>My new list of alarming fashion trends By Kelly Hockenberry, Columnist, The Times Every so often, I like to air my fashion grievances.\u00a0 They are not always met with support from you, the reader\u2026but I can\u2019t seem to stop myself. We\u2019ve been over (and over) my dislike for capri pants, jean shorts on men, Birkenstocks, [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":14703,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[245,7],"tags":[3066,3064,3067,3065],"class_list":["post-14684","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-lifestyle","category-featured","tag-eyebrow","tag-lucite-clutches","tag-uneven-hemline","tag-white-heels"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14684","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=14684"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14684\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/14703"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=14684"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=14684"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.unionvilletimes.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=14684"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}