You know what’s great about snowstorms? Nothing

Multiple feet of snow, being cooped up and all is not my cup of tea

By Kelly Hockenberry, Columnist, The Times

KellyColumn415Newest815Aaaaaaah, Jonas…you are not nearly as attractive as Nick Jonas in his Calvin Klein underwear ads. (I would share a picture, but this is a PG rated column, unfortunately). Yes, you look pretty from the window with your thirty inch drifts and swirling flakes. But I still hate you. Because I am ANTI­SNOW DAY and, however unpopular that statement may be, I am not afraid to say it. I do not like being cold. I really do not like being confined. It doesn’t matter that I had no real plans to go anywhere today…the fact that I CAN’T irritates me.

In spite of your blizzard­y wrath, I did shower and fix my hair and apply lip gloss (just to defy logic). Thankfully, as I type, we have not lost power so I can watch endless hours of mindless TV whilst simultaneously shoveling high­calorie food into my mouth. What is it about snow that makes you need to make/eat chocolate chip cookies?

Snowed In

The lovely view from my dining room window. (Grrrrrrrrrrrrr)

My children have voluntarily ventured out into the frozen tundra to play with friends. I find this mind boggling now that I am an adult…but, I suppose that before my frontal lobe was completely developed and I realized how stupid it was, I did the same thing at their age.

Thankful in times like these (and ONLY in times like these) for my chronic “old lady back” issues, I watch from the window as my poor husband shovels for the 100th time. In order to feel somewhat useful, I am busy making homemade soup (and brownies because the cookies were demolished in 12 minutes and God forbid we have no dessert) and running the washer/dryer like a laundromat.

Recently, I have heard people talking about “living off the grid”. Let me just be clear that if the isolation of this damn 36 hour storm is even a tiny window into that way of life, I say NO THANK YOU. I will take the distraction of people and modern conveniences and access to a shopping mall ALL DAY LONG over this hellish existence.

I know that I should relax and enjoy the “downtime” that Jonas has awarded us this weekend. Frankly, I would have preferred that he had come during the week so that school was cancelled and I didn’t have to worry about packing lunches or setting alarms. But, I suppose Mother Nature gets to decide. I just hope this is her last hurrah until Spring. Fingers crossed.

Happy Weekend

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3 Comments

  1. TE Resident says:

    You’re welcome Kelly! Good to hear!

    And don’t get me wrong. There is definitely a place for the distraction of the shopping mall and I appreciate modern conveniences too.

    My 14 year old would LOVE having you for a Mom, and although I used to enjoy the distraction of the Mall, , I have try my best to muster up the gumption to enjoy our visits. It’s not easy for me and I don’t do it as often as I should. Pretty much like the snow is for you. There’s probably beauty in it somewhere so this has inspired me to try harder to find it.

    Give me a good blizzard lasting days on end and I’m a happy girl.

    I could be wrong, and I am biased now but, I’d wager a lot that your boys won’t remember the shopping mall, Kelly, but that they’ll remember the Blizzard of January 2016, and the scrumptious brownies, cookies and soup you made for them.

  2. Kelly says:

    Dear TE,
    Although the part about hating snow is true (I am a summer weather kinda girl), I love having my 2 boys and husband all here under one roof. Time with the 4 of us together is fleeting and I relish it, for sure.
    Thanks for providing the sunshine to my sarcastic humor.
    Good luck shoveling out 🙂

  3. TE Resident says:

    Ohhhhhhhhhh Kelly……………

    Snow storms are the best. A peace settles in.

    How can you not be in awe as you look out your window and view the beauty, gentleness and purity of the snow covering countryside.

    We need a break from the loud noises and the grime covered streets that fill our senses every day. The serenity attracts me. It feeds the soul. It reminds of the value in gentleness.

    Snow flakes are good for the soul. They are gentle. Bunched together, they make us stop and pay attention to things more important and valuable than modern conveniences and shopping malls. And Kelly, there is nothing more useful, or more important, or more meaningful than you cooking soup and making cookies and brownies for your family in this sacred fleeting space and time.

    There is value in confinement from a good snow storm. Make a fire, wrap yourself in a blanket. Play a board game. Watch a meaningful movie with your family. Talk about it when it’s over. I learn so much about my kids by talking to them about movies we watch together.

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